Immortality or spaghetti? Why parking your spaceship inside a black hole is a huge gamble

Has this ever happened to you? You’re cavorting through deep space at near the speed of light without a care of the world when, suddenly, you realize you forgot to replace the toner cartridge in your office printer back on Earth before you left. Rather than face your disappointed co-workers after such an unforgivable oversight, you decide it would be best if you just stopped time and waited for them all to die before you return to work. So, like any space traveler hip to the works of Albert Einstein, you decide to park your spaceship at the perfect edge…

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